Oh, You, Still trying to be good eh?

Ok, so I am lazy.

With a side of sick.

And some zombie fear, which has awakened some deeply buried hatred.

Oh yes, I am not going to be nice today. I don't think you would be if idiots were moving their gabbing their maws in the most annoying fashion.

Why, Snorlax, what ever do you mean?

Code Geass

 

You know, I am not huge on Anime, but I live in a house where the president of Anime Club resides. Yes, nerdy, but informative. It doesn't take an anime freak to notice that this sad excuse of  brain melting anime is not worth watching. It's not even worth knowing,

I feel like my IQ has dropped to the dangerous zone of retardation just because I sat through four episodes. Thats right, I only watched four episodes, and even I, the slow kid, know what the hell this show is, and that my friends, is beyond sad. 

Without a doubt, A midget who is both blind and deaf could draw the conclusion that this show is a Trollop. Thats right, You dirty dirty STROMPET! 

Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion is a mecha animu noted for its clever and original plot. It became the the cancer of anime for the whole summer of 2008.

And sadly, the kemo just wont get rid of it. Its the Kieth Richards of the anime world, IT JUST WONT DIE!

The show started with the idea of writing and producing what would eventually become a new anime that would include innovative and brand-new elements never seen before in the genre: 

giant robots, large-scale military invasions, heaps upon heaps of still-attractive bishie corpses and more tits than aPlayboy shoot. 

Despite having killer-cool giant rollerskate-wearing mecha, which are clearly more effective than tanks and other conventional weapons, and lots of female military officers with e-size tits, Britannia is still just a bunch of British Francophone Nazis, who want to take over the world and do what Hitler would have done had he lived on.

The pitiful main characeter, Lelouch Lamperouge is the repulsively unlikable main character -- a pretentious bitch who lives his life in the lap of luxury, surrounded by beautiful women whom he has absolutely no attraction to. 

Apparently this not enough for the spoiled aristocratic cunt, so for the sake of the plot he one day wakes up with a terrible case of butthurt over the way the Japanese people are being treated.

oh no, Japan is being suppressed by Britania, I must change this because it is wrong, We aren't china!

Yeah, anyone else notice that too?

It's funny how Lulu doesn't even fuckin notice that Britannia is doing practically everything that Japan did to China during WWII, just with out robots that have skates. 

Lulu, then does what any self respecting citizen would do, join a resistance. Of course, this is even fucked over by that useless green haired character that mysteriously gives him superpowers called " Geass ". 

I would have been fine if CC never showed up again. But no, i had to learn her name, the idiotic whore who is akin to vaginal sandpaper. Seriously i would rather sandpaper my genitalia then deal with half the useless tripe in this show. 

Things get needlessly complicated when it turns he's the son of the Emperor of Britannia himself, and oh my god, where you surprised? I wasn't. 

The whole, " I am your father syndrome" is the most predictable bowl of toxic waste since Pam Anderson was created. Oh, she is older than Star Wars. Here, we believe that the government made her after Marilyn Monroe died, but had problems running her then just gave up after realizing that nothing is going to escape that black hole she calls a vagina.

 

BUT surprise surprise! Lulu decides to go against is father's evil political state. I really wanted to know if there was going to be some talking bears and maybe Harrison Ford. 

His fiancé is Suzaku Kururugi, a green-eyed, brown-haired Azn(because clearly Azns always have green eyes and brown hair) who has decided to join the Britannians because he firmly believes in his childhood ideals. Although the two are engaged to be married, they only fight when they're inside their Mechs because they don't know they're actually not enemies...kinda like another anime you may have seen.

Lelouch declares himself the defender of justice, assuming the name "Zero" which is oddly reminiscent to Zorro, but instead this one fails. It's a Beta version after all. After creating the most original name in existence, the black knights, a form of a terrorist vigilante group, he starts to fight back against his own nation.

During the course of the show (and again, for no particular reason), Lulu finds his awesomely hot sister Euphemia, who professes a pressing need for white and fluffy storyline development. Lulu objects, but after being offered to get into her sister's panties (no, srsly, there's that one episode where he says his sis was his first love) he readily reconsiders.

The two of them gather a whole lot of people in a closed stadium surrounded by armed military men -- always anauspicious start for creating a "white and fluffy world." While there, Euphemia asks Lulu to go to a dark backroom, where he does something to set her off (i was to busy being interested in something else) She grabs herself a gun and starts to party down like a pro.

Lulu, in order to hide that he made such a colossal error, kills her, causing yet another needless character death.

The season then ends in mass chaos.

ok, thank god, its over, but wait, NO!

The creators got together and Smoked some CRACK!

Actually, the did Heroin. ALL THE TIME!

It was already clear for the viewers that this continuation would be a bigass trainwreck from the get-go when a new lead character,Rolo, was introduced. 

It didn't take a geniusto figure out this asshole would prove to be the improbable animu version ofScrappy-Doo -- a younger, stupider, uglier, infinitely more annoying version of the main character.

Things could only go downhill from there: the continuity of the entire fucking show is totally ignored, so that the first seven episodes were made by following the same damn scenario as the first season, leavingthe viewers to wonder whether this new incarnation of Code Geass will be a similar disappointment as Higurashi

There is then a new cast of characters, WHAT THE HELL? YOU MEAN I HAVE TO KNOW THESE PEOPLE? THIS IS ONLY THE THIRD EPISODE I HAVE WATCHED!

Later on, Rolo takes Lelouch to the Wonderland of Joy and dies from the divine punishment of using the Za Warudo move that was way too cool for him. 

Lelouch suddenly battles against a floating Jupiter-like thing on the ceiling that came from a hidden dimension in his basement. 

By this point, no one who watched the show knew what the fuck was going on.

Lelouch finds himself in a world turned upside down, so now he's in control of the bad guy's side half of the world, fighting against the good guys.

Theoretically the show could have spiraled even further out of control, but luckily it didn't, because shortly thereafter the show then meets an unexpectedly simple ending, and everybody lives happily ever after. 

So we move past the show, and look closer at the episodes.

Apparently the people that made Code Geass thought it a bright idea to make every episode end the same way and despite what many with common sense would readily figure out, all the loyal fans still took the bait. At the end of each episode, one or more of these totally unpredicted happenings occur:

• Good guy becomes bad guy
• Bad buy becomes good guy
• Unexpected truth is revealed
• One of the main characters dies
• Somebody turns out to actually not be dead, even after getting a nuke dropped on them. Obviously, they had a ready supply of refrigerators and Indiana Jones instructing them.

If the repetition of episodes wasnt enough, there is the opening sequences. Like most bad animu, Code Geass had way to many. I honestly think they were trying to compete with how much dick the average sorority girl has in her mouth, but then again, i could be wrong. They may have been competing with kittens.

• FLOW - COLOURS

huge, booming, epic anthem that impresses nobody because it clearly tries way too fucking hard  

JIBUN WOOOOOOOOO~

• Jinn - "Raion"

A Japanese girl shrieking into a microphone in a failed effort to "sing", ending up sounding more like the audio to someweird porno with a Japanese girl shrieking into a microphone while scraping her vagina with sandpaper.

• access - "Hitomi no Tsubasa"

Mind-melting, ultra-hyper explosion of glittery, super-saccharine J-Techno from the people that brought you the soundtrack to Gravitation. Listening to it will make the world seem sparkly and wonderful.

Im pretty sure by now, you are asking your self, Snorlax, haven't i seen this shit before?

and i would have to say, why Yes, yes you have.

After watching a few episodes, you'll get this strange feeling of déjà vu. You see, this plot was originally played out on Death Note which failed, and before that in Final Fantasy Tactics, which sucked more than the last two combined.

The main difference between Code Geass and Death Note is that the latter is about creepy emo kids, while the former is about significantly-less-creepy-and-emo terrorist and Fascist kids -- although both contain the seemingly mandatory overload of delicious Japanese homolust.

The similarities to Final Fantasy Tactics make the blatant plagarism even more blatant: Lelouche is a noble who wants to overthrow the system by working outside it (like Ramza) and Suzaku is a lower-class born kiss-ass who wants to overthrow the system by working inside it (like Delita).

Both contain and equal amount of tiresomely ambiguous homosexual situations, as if Shounen Jump and Square  Enix(respectively) needed any more of that.

To make matters worse (or better, in case you hate this show) Rolo's special attack is actually a stolen version of Za Warudo, which came from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, a manga that, kind of like Code Geass, arbitrarily became the gayest thing in the world.